Halloween Adventures With Glitter Cat and Pink Hair.

GC: “Hey, your head just spun around really fast.”

Me: “I.. I don’t know what that means.”

GC: “Yeah, you do.” (I still don’t know what she meant)

Me: “Hey, you’re all glittery!”

GC: “Not as much as her.” (gestures to Pink Hair, who, has bright pink hair and is coated in glitter.) “There was a lot more glitter before” (gestures to her outfit, a black mini-dress, also covered with glitter.)

Me: “No, you’re still really glittery.”

GC: “Really? Even My legs?” (lifts her leg into my arm) “Look!”

Me: “They’re good.”

GC: “Oh yeah, I had a mask, but I took it off. (Shows me her cat mask) Where are you from? Here?”

Me: “No, Chicago.”

GC: “New York.”

PH: “North Carolina”

Me: “So, North Carolina, that’s like way better than South Carolina, right?”

PH: “Hey, Don’t talk shit about South Carolina, my cousin lives there!”

GC: “Yeah, are you looking to fight?”

PH: “No, well, actually South Carolina sucks.”

Me: “Are you looking to fight, someone?”

GC: “I don’t know, maybe.”

Me: “Do you want to fight that guy?” (Points to a random guy)

CG: “I’m not fighting a guy!”

Me: “What about that tall chick.”

CG: “I don’t want to fight her either.” (hands me the cat mask) “Oh, wait. Sorry for just assuming you’d hold it, you just look like the kind of guy who’d carry my stuff for me and follow me around.”

Me: “(pause) No, that’s fairly accurate.”

GC: “Wear the mask now.”

Me: “I’m not wearing the mask.”

GC: “Wear the mask!”

Me: “–SIGH– alright.”

GC: (Takes a picture of me of me and Pink Hair.)

Her: “Alright. Try my drink. Take a real gulp, not like a pussy sip.”

Me: “It’s not bad.”

GC: “Drink her drink now.”

A few hours later as I as leaving, I ran into them again.

Me: “Uhm, hey, uhm, do you guys need a ride?”

PH: “No, I don’t know, we’re fine.”

Me: “Are you sure? It’s kinda cold, and you know, halloween costumes.”

GC: “Yeah, alright.”

PH: “What about the Uber?”

GC: “I can cancel the Uber?”

Me: “Will you give me five stars?”

PH: “Wait. Are you a Lyft?”

GC: “No, he’s making a joke. (Pause) How do I cancel an Uber? Is it on the App?”

PH: “Your car smells like candy!”

Me: “Actually, it’s Cupcakes!”

They left a layer of glitter each on my car seats.

For the record, that’s way better than a five star review. That’s like a million stars. A million glittery sparkly stars. Also my car does smell like cupcakes.


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