Pointless film list 2014

Since no one will tag me in one of these lists (gives disappointed look to audience), I’m going to do my 15 or so great or influential movies or whatever list. Aka here’s some Disney films. (Kidding. Mostly.)

1. Tangled – while I begrudgingly admit that Frozen is the superior film/musical/story, Tangled is way more important to me. The perfect animation style in it’s fluid traditional animation form and expressionist painting style. And those Glen Keane designs?! Also: I waited over ten years for Rapunzel. And it gave me my best friend, so there’s that.

2. Children of Men – Alfonso Cuarón’s dystopian James Bond with stoner Michael Caine and the best second act twist in film history. Not as flashy as Cuarón’s Gravity (and no floating Sandra Bullock in her underwear) but it features two of the best single shots in film. Ever.

3. Michael Clayton – George Clooney, the beat down, alcoholic gambler law firm fixer A movie that makes an odd choice to tell you the climax in the opening sequence. Dylan Kissinger told me I was the Michael Clayton of Casa Bonita.

4. Ratatouille – Brad Bird’s masterpiece. Yes, even over Iron Giant, Incredibles and uh.. Mission Impossible: Renner. Bird makes you care about the most ridiculous premise ever.

5. Raiders of the Lost Ark – sentimentally Last Crusade is my favorite, but it’s impossible to deny the perfection and love that permeates every frame of this film.

6. The Empire Strikes Back – as a child the only Star Wars film we had was Empire. And even though I’ve watched it over and over and over again it still holds up as perfect, which is odd considering it’s not a complete film. It has no thematic beginning or ending.

7. Beauty and the Beast – Aladdin may have started me, but going back to the prior year fed my addiction and started my obsession. Also: Glen Keane’s animation of Beast turning into a man is the best animation EVER.

8. Batman: Mask of the Phantasm – the best Batman movie. Period. (And the second best Joker movie). Batman vs gangsters. Batman and the Joker with a jet pack. Dana Delany (❤️)

9. Back to the Future – blame everything I know in life on the two Bob’s and their perfect screenplay.

10. Vertigo – Hitchcock. Novak. Stewart.

11. From Russia With Love – my favorite Bond. The hottest Bond girl. Knife shoes. Gypsy fights. And less rape than the average Connery Bond film.

12. Mallrats – yes. It’s not Kevin Smith’s best film. And thanks to Cop Out, it’s not his worst, but it is the perfect representation of my youth and my culture. And Stan Lee. (The older I get, Clerks 2 might take it’s place..)

13. American Graffiti – George Lucas’ best film. Baby Richard Dreyfus.

14. Ponyo – Miyazkaki’s gem. Charming and entertaining and not nearly as culturally baffling as some of his other films.

15. Lilo & Stitch – Chris Sander’s dysfunctional masterpiece with it’s watercolor backgrounds, amazing Andres Deja animation and Tia Carrere’s lovely calves. The shining gem of the darkest era of Disney Animation.

16-20: Jaws, Spider-Man 2 (Rami), Superman (Donner), Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Moulin Rouge.

Bonus: my favorite film (so far, I mean, there’s still a Disney coming) this year:

The Winter Soldier/Days of Future Past/Guardians of the Galaxy –

Ok. I lied. But I can’t choose. As fantastic as James Gunn’s perfect space romp was, this was also the year where Bryan Singer fixed the X-Men (James Marsden <3) and The Russo Brothers (from Community!) made a cap/black widow buddy spy film with a dude with a metal arm that wasn’t ridiculous, throwing a bomb into the whole marvel continuity, Sam Jackson finally doing something and the freaking FALCON! Even if he didn’t talk to birds 😦

Ok, that was fun.


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